Accepting the way I am

A girl with strange voice

“Do you mind if I say something..”, a boy who was mere spectator few minutes ago interrupted me amid of the conversation which I was having with one of my friends.

I could sense those electrifying negative vibes from him, still the other half of the brain truly named as ‘inviting trouble’ was curious to hear the expected!  I stopped for a while, not my tongue, “tell me, what it is?” I asked. I was rough with my eyes, I wish he could have sensed that and had stopped being ridiculous but no he was ready to dig his own grave.

“You sound interesting”, not again I thought. 

“Oh really!” I pretended as if I was hearing any such thing for the first time in my life.

I should have cut off the conversation and have rushed back to my place but this time I decided to face the truth. Whatever happens next will be entirely my responsibility.

This time the warrior me was armoured and was ready with its sword.

How could I except someone to sham me with something which is partially God-gifted. I have stretched it so long, I could have answered people and shut them with my witty reply which I could only figure out when they have already left. It has to end and this was the perfect time to clean it off from my mind.

“Say it…what is interesting about my voice?”, I asked that boy., where my heart beat was pacing I knew things might turn worse, if I couldn’t control my anger after his silly response. 

And then it came like a knife razored smoothly on my skin.

“You sound like Donald duck..quaaa..quaaa..quaaa”, and he laughed.

I laughed along but the only difference was he did enjoy what he said and I pretended. I had no words, because this was different. It was new.

"Have you ever noticed?" he asked, but wasn't interested in the answer anymore after noticing my ashen face.

What I hate is, it’s my voice which takes all the credits wherever I go whether it’s school or college or workplace…as if I don’t exist. As if my beautiful eyes, my reddish hair which people compliment before hearing a word of thanks from me, don’t exist. As if I’m born to be associated with Rani Mukherjee, which actually is equivalent to 'weirdest tone I’ve ever heard coming out from a girl’s throat'.

Hmmm let it go.. I have to say something to that Boy/Man:

“I was not born with it, but you know what happened? It is a similar story as yours but with different endings. Do you wanna hear it?

When you got your beards and biceps at that age, I got bloods (I’m a girl, it proves it) okay, then this happened I coughed for about four months, kept talking to my classmates in my heavy voice, I thought it will go soon, like always…but strangely this never happened. I was patient for a year by avoiding group discussion, speeches, singing, arguing with someone..I avoided everything I could to escape from embarrassment. Then, my throat settled on a cracked heavy pinching shrilled voice at the age of 15, when I was in standard nine and it has continued till now…I got a long unnecessarily treatment for five long years, where I could not eat pickles, drink cold water or drinks, I was not allowed to speak much etc etc. There wasn’t a treatment for it, just an operation to help me out without any guarantee I could ever speak. It was all biological, that's it. You know what, it was a mishap. It is like waking up one morning and finding a big black spot at your face and not able to remove it for years and years. Then you start accepting yourself as you are. I did the same. And I’m happy that I’ve a strange voice than not having one.

Thankyou for being honest. But I know how I sound and it’s not like Donald duck. Hope you get any other animated character to compare me with."